Number 5: Femininity Can Reflect Even the Smallest Ray of Light

Woman… God’s Good Thing!  An In-depth look into Femininity from the Proverbs 31 Woman

The Proverbs 31 woman’s husband was known in the gates as he set among the elders.  Funny... You may wonder what does that have to do with her?  Well, you would probably be surprised at how much a wife is looked at when a husband is being considered for a position in a high place.  Sitting with the elders in the gates was high positioning back in those days.  It’s where business was handled and many political affairs were decided.  Though most of us will not have to deal with the public eye when we consider accepting a marriage proposal, we should still understand that we are a reflection of our husband even in the smallest arena.  Even family members will take notice to how a woman responds concerning her husband in his presence and when he’s not around.  A man’s character, devotion and behavior can easily be seen through his wife.  Therefore, everything in her demeanor will be a reflection of him.

One might ask, “Doesn’t then the responsibility rely on the husband’s behavior”?  Yes, somewhat, but please consider this: Choosing to reflect the positive about one’s relationship will always be a celebration of light and godly character.  A wife can choose to dwell in the rays of good things that the husband reflects to her (no matter how small or few they are) or she can choose to dwell in the darkness of everything that he does wrong.  She could ridicule and remind everyone of his human failures or she could focus her attention to what he’s doing right.  So then as wives, we have a choice to either magnify his strength or expose his weakness.  I’m sure that you have lived long enough to know that men and women surely have both!

Trust me...  Choosing to constantly complain about your husband’s infirmity, especially in front of others, will never get you out of those dark places.  Not only will he eventually despise you, others will too.  Other people certainly take notice of women who seem to magnify their husband’s weaknesses everywhere they go.  They understand that these women are looking for some kind of approval or affirmation that they are the "good one".  Instead of sympathy, she will get disdain.  No man or woman would want to be slandered by their own spouse so most of us have a low tolerance for others that do so.  Our spouse should be the very person in our life that decides purposely to reveal our good nature to others while giving us the safety and room to grow and come up higher (Special note: taking his weakness to God in prayer is a much better option).

The Proverbs 31 woman understood her obligation to her husband’s reputation.  She chose to reflect his goodness and light so that both of them were accepted by all.  Femininity can reflect even the smallest light in masculinity.  A woman doesn’t have to (it’s a choice), but doing so would be a very wise and good thing.  Log on next week for the continued study of Woman... God's Good Thing.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Number 4: Femininity is ALWAYS Beautiful

Woman…God’s Good Thing! An In-depth look into Femininity from the Proverbs 31 Woman

The Proverbs 31 woman made tapestry for herself.  Her clothing was made with fine linen and purple (very expensive material back in her day).  Some people will try and tell you that women are more vain today than they used to be.  But women have always cared about their appearance and we always will.  Whether it’s putting on beautiful clothing or doing something new with our hair, it’s just a way of saying, “I enjoy being a girl”.  There seems to be some misconception too, that God is against women that “adorn themselves” but everything that the Proverbs 31 woman did was praised by Him (primping too) and precisely placed in His word!  The problem is not that God doesn’t appreciate beauty in women, it’s that the world doesn’t appreciate the divine beauty in every detail of femininity. Truthfully, a woman who takes time to care about the way she looks is celebrating her femininity.  She is saying “I’m happy about being a woman”.

God never intended that a woman’s body be worshipped but He did intend that man take notice.  He never intended that women hate themselves because they don’t fit into the world’s image of beauty.  He intended that we have an understanding of what feminine beauty is.  Femininity is and will always be beautiful by what God desired to see when He looked our way.  What the world tries to push on women isn’t beauty at all.  It’s a false sense of identity to keep us feeling inadequate so that we remain vulnerable to all sorts of prey.  The definition of beauty is not “perfect form” nor is it “perfectly youthful”.  The definition of beauty is “pleasing to the eye” and yes, beauty is still in the eyes of the beholder.  Sometimes as women, we must ask the question,"whose eyes are beholding me and who is the beholder that I must impress?"

So what does God see when He beholds the beauty of femininity?  He sees the softness and the gentleness that can bring “quiet” to even the noisiest atmosphere just by entering it.  He sees the conceiver and bearer of life. Whether it’s nursing a baby or looking after an elderly parent - no one has the ability to sustain life like a woman.  He sees a comforter and nurturer and everything else that goes along with being someone’s daughter, mother, aunt, sister or wife.  To God, beauty is in our countenance and it’s in our response.  It’s in our eyes and it’s in our smile.  Don’t believe that one’s countenance and smile can make you beautiful?  Then take the time to visit a nursing home soon where I’m sure you will find many ninety year old women who are absolutely beautiful.

So fix it, curl it, or straighten it...  Buy it, wear it, and feel good about it!  Just know that what makes you beautiful is deeper than anything that you can put on or take off.  The Proverbs 31 woman made herself some beautiful clothes.  She obviously knew how to look good but it was her feminine design that made her all together beautiful.  Fixing up the outside is never a bad thing but understanding the beauty underneath the skin of femininity is a very good thing.  Log on next week for the continued study of Woman... God's Good Thing.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Number 3: Femininity Wants to Help and is a Giver by Design

Woman…God’s Good Thing! An In-depth look into Femininity from the Proverbs 31 Woman

The Proverbs 31 woman extended her hands to the poor and reached out her hands to the needy.  Every woman is a helper and giver by God’s design whether she knows it or not.  When God created a woman it was after He had already created a man.  So you can be sure that His plan for women was thoughtful and strategic in keeping with the order of things.  God was sure not to give the same instincts and characteristics to both the man and the woman.  Masculinity was created with the nature of "pursuer and conqueror".  Femininity was created with the nature of "if you are lucky enough to catch me, I can and will help you" (and I’ve been around long enough to know that masculinity definitely needs our help!).  The giver and helper in femininity coincide with the rest of her personality so that masculinity feels good about what he’s already pursued and conquered.  Not only is the woman "God’s gift to man", she is the gift that keeps on giving.

Giving and helping is very rewarding and fulfilling to the female nature.  Whether it’s a delicious meal that an older woman has cooked or a helping hand from a young girl, femininity wants to do something for someone else.  We all probably know a few examples of women who don’t strike us as helpers or givers but take note that these women are usually not the happiest people in the world.  As a matter of fact, they generally are the most miserable!  Women were made to help and are deeply satisfied when they can give.  Even in this modern society, there are many highly educated and successful women that still feel incomplete because they have no family or no man in their life that they can help.  Our generation of women has come further than just having his baby or baking his bread, but trust me, femininity still wants to give masculinity something! lol

After the Proverbs 31 woman made sure that her family had everything that they needed, she helped and gave to others.  She wanted to help and was a giver by God’s design.  She was a good thing and so are you! Log on next week for the continued study of Woman... God's Good Thing.

Loving U like a Sister,

Regina

Number 2: Femininity is Gifted on Purpose with a Purpose

Woman…God’s Good Thing! An In-depth look into Femininity from the Proverbs 31 Woman

God knew what He was doing when He made you.  He knew the very skill that would thrive in you and at the same time bring Him great pleasure in your existence.  The Proverbs 31 woman used her skill and talent to build up her family and honor God.  She sought after and collected her own resources.  She produced her own goods.  She knew how to invest her money and started her own business.  She used her God-given attributes and became a source of strength for everyone around her. Wow!  Don’t you wish you could be like her?  Well, I’m willing to go out on a limb and say that you probably are.

I cannot tell you how many times that I’ve heard a woman say that she’s isn’t good at anything.  I’ve heard some women say that skill and talent somehow passed them by and that they didn’t have much to offer.  Not too long ago, I was talking to a very special someone who told me that she didn’t feel smart or talented.  I pointed out that her house was so beautifully decorated that I was sure Martha Stewart would have given her an award had she seen it!  She was comparing her life to other women and what they were doing with their life.  In my opinion, she had overlooked her own talent and some major praise worthy things that she had done.  Not only is her home beautifully decorated but for several years now, it has been a welcoming and hospitable place for many pastors, church events, children and relatives.

God knew the very skill to give you that would complement your family and help build His kingdom.  The gifts and talent that God gives come with great purpose (God purpose).  His gifting doesn’t have man’s glory in mind.  Don’t think that God left you out or forgot to give you something good.  Instead, seek His face and pray for what’s in you to be revealed.  You are uniquely gifted to achieve the task and fulfill the plan that God had in mind when He made you.  Remember, God didn’t praise the Proverbs 31 woman because she was gifted.  After all, He was the one who gave her the ability. He praised her because of how she used her gifting to serve and build up everyone around her.

The feminine design has never been lacking in skill or talent. The Proverbs 31 woman used hers wisely.  There are many skilled and talented women who are serving the world (singers, dancers, actresses, etc.) but it’s only the women who use their ability to build up their family and honor God that get called "A Good Thing".  Log on next week for the continued study of  Woman... God's Good Thing.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Number 1: Femininity is Excellent at Securing the Masculine Heart

Woman…God’s Good Thing! An In-depth look into Femininity from the Proverbs 31 Woman

The detailed listing of the Proverbs 31 Woman and all of her attributes begin in verse 11:  The heart of her husband safely trusts her, so he will have no lack of gain.  She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.   Femininity is excellent at securing the masculine heart.   No other created being has the ability to get as close to the man’s heart like the woman.  Therefore, no other being has the responsibility to the man like the woman.  Probably the greatest issue affecting our society today is a lack of trust and our marriages are no exception.  So we can be sure that trust will be at the top of the list of what men want and need in women.

Now more than ever, men are concerned about money and many will be more likely to work toward spending wisely when they feel that their wives are on board too.  Men are naturally inclined to want to have something to show for all their hard work and they are more motivated by what they can provide for their family than what most women think.  There will always be exceptions, but for the most part, wives have more influence than what they realize when it comes to helping husbands get or stay motivated in managing money.  Something to remember is that masculinity hates to deny femininity anything (it makes him feel like a man) so women should not only set a limit on what they are spending but on what they are asking as well.  Even though most households have both the husband and wife bringing income in, he still needs to know that he can trust you with what’s going out.

Another important issue of trust in marriage is sex.  There are many sexual avenues that a man could travel down but only one that doesn’t lead him to a place of shame.  A husband needs a wife who offers a loyal and secure bed.  One of the most difficult things to get women to understand is their God-given ability to strengthen their sexual union with their husband and how important it is to do so.  Most men just want a secure relationship where they can be free and enjoy their life.  Husbands will entrust their heart to wives who have secured the bedroom in loyalty allowing them a place of fulfillment without any guilt.

A woman who is concerned with securing her husband’s heart is like the Proverb 31 Woman, abounding in femininity and definitely …A Good Thing!  Log on next week for the continued study of Woman…God’s Good Thing.

Loving U like A Sister,

Regina

Woman... God's Good Thing! - Introduction

Woman…God’s Good Thing

An In-depth Look into Femininity from Proverbs 31

Ever noticed how “it’s a boy” or ‘it’s a girl” seems to have lost its distinctiveness?  Not too long ago, there was a certain expectation that seem to accompany one’s sex.  Do you know what I mean?  There was a celebration over the specific sex of that child being born and an understanding as to what that new person would offer in their role to the family and society.  A boy would be celebrated as one who would bring strength and leadership.  He would carry the family name into future generations.  A girl would be celebrated as one who would bring beauty and nurturing.  She would be the one who would carry life in her very own body into future generations.

Oh that we could get back to the celebration of masculinity and femininity!  The gifting and ability that has been given to both sexes should be looked into with much appreciation, wonderment, and respect.  God has never once changed His idea of what is to be expected from His creation.  A little boy will grow up to be a man and God will hold him accountable according to His design and expectation for him.  A little girl will grow up and become a woman and God will hold her accountable to His design and expectation for her.  He places a high value on both male and female but has a required role for both of His design.

One thing that’s quite clear these days is that there is a lot of confusion as to what the design and role of a woman is.  The image of femininity has been somewhat distorted over time and our role models seem to be disappearing at an alarming rate.  There’s confusion in both the home and church as to what is the God given role for a woman.  Women want to know where the boundaries are and where would be crossing the line?  In just the last century alone the boundary for women was moved so many times that now we’re not sure where to stand.  Everything has been argued (without clarity or remedy) from women working outside the home to the length of our sleeve and the hem of our dress.  Yet still, most women try to fit into a mold of something we’ve heard or seen that looks or feels like it might be accepted.

So where is our help and where is our understanding?  As in everything else, it’s in the Lord who made the heavens and earth and all that is in it (yes, women too). The Bible is the complete authority and reference to what God had in mind when He made a woman. Femininity has its own personality, excellence, and skill.  Before we begin the next segment, look into the mirror and see “the woman” and understand that this is your identity.  Your identity is not what you do it’s what you are.  I will use myself as an example:  “I am a woman who happens to be a minister”, not “a minister who happens to be a woman.”  My identity is that I’m a woman.  My greatest fulfillment and pleasures in life will come from the things pertaining to women not ministers.  Therefore, occupying the earth will be centered on the fact that I am A Woman… Log on in two days as we begin our look into the life of the Proverb 31 Woman.

Loving U like a Sister,

Regina

Woman... God's Good Thing!

I would like to thank everyone for their comments and the wonderful response to the study of the Shulamite.  It is always encouraging to hear from you.  I would also like to let everyone know that our new website for women will be finished soon!  I know that this will be especially encouraging for those of you who left private messages and prayer requests because the website will not only offer great resources to help women in their Christian walk but will be a place for prayer requests as well.  It is always a good thing when we can find a place of agreement in prayer.  In a world where women are hurting and suffering in so many ways please note:  we are honored to pray for you and are in agreement with what God’s word says for your life.

I would like to invite everyone to log on next week for the beginning of a new teaching series... "Woman… God’s Good Thing".  The word of God says that a man who gets a wife gets a good thing.  To tell you the truth, not only was I curious about what God himself would call a good thing, I was surprised at how much I really wanted to be one.  It is amazing how much we can learn about our feminine nature when we let down the guard and let the Holy Spirit show us what’s hidden on the inside.  Deeply hidden on the inside of me was a woman who wanted better and wanted to do better.  I have also found that no man in his right mind can resist a good thing!

Women’s lives have changed so much down through the centuries but God’s word still retains its meaning and is in every way applicable today. I can assure you that masculinity is still very much captivated and somewhat intoxicated by femininity.  There are some counterfeits out there that try and mimic femininity or imitate it.  I always say, "You can doll it up to look like a woman but what makes us women is God given and it goes way down deep past the skin and bone."  You can shave its legs and put a wig on it, but being a woman is more than smooth legs and fixed hair (although the men really appreciate us for doing so lol!).  Femininity is in the very depth of our soul and spirit.  It’s more than the way we walk and more than just the way we talk.

God knew what He was doing when He made a woman and He declares us a good thing.  Maybe you are not convinced of that or maybe you are curious as to the details of what God would call a good thing.  Perhaps you want to have something better or you are looking to become something better.  It will always begin with the word of God.  Read Proverbs Chapter 31 this week.  From this teaching series in this one little chapter of the Bible, you will see what men want and need in women.  You will have a better understanding of what women find rewarding and fulfilling.  You will see what God values and praises in women.  You will see the blessings that accompany balance and order and so much more.  You will see that the Proverb 31 Woman was a good thing and you are probably more like her than you think.  So log back on soon and check out …Woman… God’s Good Thing!

Loving U Like a Sister,
 
Regina

I'm Glad that God Uses Weak Things!

Have you ever asked God to change your nature into something that’s a little easier for you to deal with?

Through the years, God has changed many things in my life.  He has given back and restored many things that were broken, lost or stolen in my past years of sin.  He has healed many relationships in my life especially the ones that were needed mostly (my relationship with my husband and father).  He has changed my attitude, outlook and desires.  He has given me faith and several opportunities to build upon it.  He has given me the land and so many times, He has personally chosen to give me the morning (the newness that only He can bring).  Yet in all these things, I have not convinced Him to change my nature.  This person in me, or this personality that I carry around, is just not impressive.  Oh the times I thought that if I could convince God to let me be another or let me trade personalities with another, then I would have it made and life would be so much easier.  All my insecurities would be gone!

There is a major problem with the idea of trading natures though...  If God were to speak today and give me permission to trade with someone else, which one would I choose?  Finding someone who has no personality flaws would be tough.  Where could I find someone who has no weakness in his or her flesh?  Is there anyone out there who is completely confident and proficient in every area of their life?  I have been searching for a while but I’ve found none.  It seems we all have a weakness.  Some people are just better at covering up more than others.  I have lived long enough to know that you can train your responses to be acceptable in front of others but all of us have something in our “natural blood” to contend with.

One thing you can be sure of today is that God does care about you and the weakness in your flesh.  He may not ever change it because it may be the very thing that keeps you depending on His Strength.  He doesn’t leave it there to torment you.  God uses weak places to show Himself strong.  The only people who are ever defeated by personal weaknesses are the ones who refuse to give them over to God.  He has proved over and over again that His grace is sufficient for all of us.  I was reading a book by Robert A. Schuller a few days ago and I couldn’t help but laugh at his detailed listing of the people in the Bible.  He started out with Noah was a drunk, Abraham was too old, Isaac was a daydreamer, Jacob was a liar, Joseph was abused, Moses stuttered, Gideon was afraid and I’m sure you get the point of his list!

My point today is don’t let the weakness in you be your excuse for not trying and stop thinking that you are the only one.  Don’t waste time wishing you were someone else.  They too have a weakness.  Give everything that is in you to GOD.  He can use you and when it comes to your weakness, He will most likely use IT too!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

#7 Her Responsibility to the Younger Generation

# 7:  Her Responsibility to the Younger Generation - the final segment in the study of the Shulamite woman from the series "Then I Became in His Eyes as One Who Found Peace"


In our nation, we see many examples of people being blessed to be a blessing.  Celebrities give out of their wealth.  Social clubs and colleges are routinely involved with humanitarian work.  I’ve even seen people living here from other countries send back assistance to help family and friends reach selective goals in business or education.  Many of us have caught on to the idea that when we find ourselves in a better place, we should help someone else.  For the church though, our outreach should exceed the work of the average helping hand.  Christians have a responsibility not only to reach out, but also to help carry the Gospel to every nation while living a life of enticement that will inspire future generations.

In Song of Solomon, It seemed that the Shulamite woman understood her responsibility to the next generation.  Her role as Queen was an opportunity for influence and favor given to her by God.  It’s interesting and inspiring how she used her position to instruct the young women who ran after her.  She was careful to help them understand her success.  The Shulamite woman not only made it to a better place but she wanted to teach other women how to make it as well.  You would be surprised at how many successful businesses and ministries have been built on these same desires.

Today, there are many offers on the table for women.  The world is offering promises and rewards from many different products in many different ways.  As women, we are more likely to be targeted by manufacturers than men.  They understand that a lot of women are not only desperate for change but they are more than willing to pay for it.  Unfortunately though, most of what the world is selling women is a farce and the end result will probably be pain.  God’s offer is and shall remain the best on the table.  He offers truth with an end result of peace.  The Shulamite woman found peace.  She put all of the elements of virtue and godliness together and found lasting peace.

If you are searching for a better result than what you keep getting then it’s time to make a change.  If what you are applying is not bringing a return of peace then it’s time to apply a new principle.  Sometimes we blame a bad harvest on the ground and never check into the kind of seed that we are sowing.  Only the word of God has power in every principle, that when applied, can and will bring a positive change.  God’s word works!  For the women who said amen to that last sentence, what are you doing right now to help the younger generation?  Let me challenge you to make it a priority today to tell a young woman about the love of Jesus Christ and the peace that is genuinely found in GOD.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

#6 Her Understanding of True Love

#6  Her Understanding of True Love - the continued study of the Shulamite woman from the series "Then I Became in His Eyes as One Who Found Peace"

I am convinced that at least half, if not more than half, of the world is clueless to the meaning of true love.  We have piles of love songs, poems, books and movies that portray the romantic notions of love, but very few icons where its depth and true meaning are clearly seen or defined.  This is a sad truth because if we live in a society that only understands love in the concept of romantic feelings then we are all in trouble.  Young men and women who don’t understand the difference between emotion and devotion will never have any quality relationships.  These young men and women I am referring to could easily end up being our children and grandchildren.

One of the most admonishing passages to young women from Song of Solomon is the words of the Shulamite woman: “His banner over me was love”.  She was fully convinced of the king’s love for her.  Not only could she identify it, but she obviously knew the importance of pointing it out to the younger women who were following her example.  She understood the value that the king had placed on her by making her his bride.  His banner over her was obvious and identifiable by the engagement and ceremony as well as the wedding night.  His banner over her was love, not lust.  The Shulamite was able to return and validate the King’s desire for her because of her knowledge and proof of his banner.  No woman should ever accept a man’s desire for her without it being inside the boundary of true love.

A man’s desire for a woman without the shelter of love can easily end up in disaster.  Desire alone has the potential to rob, devour and devastate a woman.  God gave men a STRONG desire for women but He only gave it legal access under the banner of love.  Why?  Because God knew that a man acting within his desire wouldn’t be much more than a taker but, in love, he would want to protect and give to her as well.  What a brilliant God!  Pretty good set up if you ask me. 

God never intended on women being used or abused and there are certainly women who have ended up in both situations unaware and unintentionally. Truthfully though, we all know of someone (maybe even us) who decided to go into a relationship without checking or even acknowledging what his banner over them (or us) really was.  It is not as difficult as we sometimes make it out to be.  Identifying the banner can be as simple as asking a few good questions.  Is there a ring or a wedding date?  What is his banner over you, love or something else?  I have learned that women who understand true love will not settle for anything less, but women who lack understanding will settle for just being desired time and time again.  Be smart and remain in peace like the Shulamite woman...  His banner over her was love.  She understood and so should you.

Log on next week for the final study of the Shulamite woman and how to find peace in  #7, "Her Responsibility to the Younger Generation".

Loving U like A sister,

Regina

#5 Her Respect of Jealousy

#5 Her Respect of Jealousy - the continued study of the Shulamite woman from the series "Then I Became in His Eyes as One Who Found Peace"

Her words, “Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm; for love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave; its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame”…… The Shulamite woman understood the anguish and passion of jealousy.  She understood that there would be enticements that would pull for the king’s affection.  She also understood that there would be distractions that would pull for his time.  It’s interesting though, she never gave up her right to feel protective over their relationship.  Her request for the king’s devotion and commitment to her wasn’t childish or brazen. Her desire seems to be more in line with what God requires in His relationships from all of us.

In the Bible, we learn of God’s character, standard, and will.  He proclaims that He is a jealous God. He is mindful of worldly competition and expects our complete attachment and devotion to Him.  God is Holy and has neither thought nor action that is in any way evil or carnal.  Yet, He is jealous over our relationship with Him.  So as a wife, we too can have a proper respect for jealousy that is not based on anything hateful or insecure but on protectiveness and wisdom.

The Shulamite woman had a respect for jealousy that she used to her advantage.  She understood that the closer she got to the king, the better the relationship would be.  Intimacy in marriage is a major defense against many enemies.  Because of jealousy, she was vigilant and fervent to do everything in her power to stay on his mind and in his heart (I could give you a lot of good suggestions here, but I'll let you use your own imagination!).  Back in her time, the seal was a symbol of her being his possession.  She loved the idea of completely belonging to him!  We have come a long way, haven’t we?  Have we?  lol!

So, these days, wives contend with husbands who have business opportunities, ministry opportunities, recreational opportunities, and many, many other opportunities!  Some of these opportunities have the potential to defraud the wife (and the entire family, for that matter) in one way or another (I'm only speaking balance, not restriction).  What’s a girl to do?  Harden your heart and say, "why bother"?  Silence will probably cost you more in the long run.  Many women in their later days spew out poison from what was held back in their former days.  Just being quiet about something and being at peace with something is not the same thing.  Pretending not to be bothered will show up again in the form of bitterness and hate when you least expect it.

The Shulamite woman found peace through speaking her heart to her husband and voicing her jealousy. She not only voiced her concern with jealousy but she respected it enough to let it motivate her toward working on a closer relationship with him.  Maybe you too could benefit from identifying how you feel about jealousy.  You don’t have to drown in it to respect it.  It could be a great tool to help you become an even greater wife.   Believe it or not, it could be one of the key factors hidden in your marriage that helps bring peace.

Log on next week and find out more about the Shulamite woman and how to find peace in study #6, "Her Understanding of True Love".

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

#4: The Fight for Her Sexual Identity

#4: The Fight for Her Sexual Identity - the continued study of the Shulamite woman from the series "Then I Became in His Eyes as One Who Found Peace"

The correlation between past experiences and now behavior is evident and can be used as a study to help people understand how they ended up where they are.  This is extremely good news to the people who struggle with their sexual identity.  A lot of times we tend to think only of homosexuality but there are many areas of sexual confusion that are developed or programmed into women because of situations from their past.

For many years I have prayed with women who have had struggles ranging from sexual deviance all the way to being indifferent or cold toward their husbands.  These are very intimate issues so most of the time they suffer silently in their anger or shame.  The good news though is that none of these issues are too difficult for God.  Through the power of His anointing, yokes are destroyed and identity can be built back by His word.  We really can be reprogrammed back into the person that God intended us to be before we were wounded.

In Song of Solomon, there is a passage about a dream that the Shulamite woman had one night.  She was awakened by an inner struggle of passion, timing, and confusion over what was appropriate.  In her struggle, she left the safety of her room and went out into the night.  The watchmen found her and they struck her.  They wounded her and took her veil away.  The veil can represent anything from virginity to specifically belonging to a certain person or group.  So in other words, taking away the veil was damaging to her identity and damaging to her future.

For the Shulamite woman, this was just a very bad dream, but for millions of women around the world this is a reality.  The number of women that have suffered some type of abuse keeps growing... Therefore, the number of hurting women coming through the church doors is growing and growing… Only God can change back what would have been and should have been before one was struck down and wounded.  The Shulamite woman found peace when she woke up from her bad dream.  For the rest of us, peace will be found in a relationship with a loving and healing God.

Log on next week and find out more about the Shulamite woman and how to find peace in study #5, "Her Respect of Jealousy".


Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

#3 The Law of Attraction

#3:  Her Attraction to Him  The continued study of the Shulamite woman from the Old Testament book: Song of Solomon

You have probably heard the statement, "want what you have".  The enemy is always ready to deceive and devour those who dwell in the land of discontentment.  A wife who is able to keep an attitude of “I’m here because I want to be” has not only become a defense against many enemy forces in her own marriage but she has also created an area of great expectation for her daughter and her future marriage.  In other words, why would a daughter want to save herself for something that looks miserable?  It’s a proven fact that children learn what they live and a woman who lives scornfully inside her marriage need not expect her daughters to have a high regard for it.  On the other hand, a woman who knows how to celebrate her husband within her home will not only help cultivate a healthy desire but also a hope of something worth waiting for in all her children.

The Shulamite woman was able to express clearly how she felt about her marriage.  She certainly displayed an attitude of “I’m glad to be here”.  She was able to model a woman who was content and at peace with how things had turned out.  Her celebration of her husband was enticing and admonishing to us all!  She definitely knew how to talk to the King.  She understood how to affirm his masculinity, praise his strength and appreciate his power.  What man could resist such a woman?  I mean, if you were a man, wouldn’t you want to be with someone who takes pleasure in your company rather than be with someone who makes you feel like a chore?  As Christian women, we should always remember that under our husband’s Christian tag is a human tag and God made us human first.  The sin nature has an unhealthy appetite but there is such a thing as human hunger (more on that some other time).

Having trouble celebrating your husband today?  Maybe desire isn’t what it used to be?  Then be encouraged by the study of the Shulamite woman and her ability to find peace.  She was able to sustain her desire for the King by keeping her focus on his strength.  She describes his body as carved ivory, his hands as rods of gold, and his legs as pillars of marble (all of these symbolize great value and strength).  Every man has his own value and strength whether his title is "King" or not. If you ask God to anoint your eyes, you will see your husband’s masculinity as never before and your praise of him will unlock many doors of new desire between you both.  I tell women, “never underestimate the power of attraction” and most people will get up early for something they desire (and even stay up late).  There are perversions and counterfeits to both sides, but it’s only through the connection between masculinity and femininity that people find true fulfillment and peace.

Log on next week and find out more about the Shulamite woman and how to find peace in study #4, "The Fight for Her Sexual Identity".

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

#2 The Importance of Her Self Esteem

Insight Number Two: The Importance of Her Self Esteem

It’s easy to feel insecure in a world that constantly tells you that you’re not enough.  Most women have to battle negative thoughts and feelings about themselves. It’s funny though - most of us never even question where those negative thoughts are coming from. We need to stop and consider where it is that we are getting our information. As Christian women, we have God’s Spirit of truth and acceptance that lives on the inside of us. We can train our ear to listen to what His voice says about us instead of what the world is telling us.

The Shulamite woman seems to have battled thoughts that caused her to doubt and question her value as she compared herself to other women. How many times have we been there? In the first chapter of Song of Solomon, she is apologizing for the color of her skin as if she’s not enough or not as beautiful as all of the other fair skinned women (how funny is that to our generation of tanners?!). It’s interesting though, at the beginning of the very next chapter she is referring to herself as the rose of Sharon and the Lily of the Valleys. It seems that a deeper voice of esteem and assurance took dominion over those insecure thoughts. According to the scholars, she was a poor country girl who worked with her family tending grapes. She would have had every imaginable reason to feel less or lower than the others but her words reveal that she was able to identify herself as something beautiful that she was offering the King.

The Shulamite woman was able to exemplify that being different from everyone else doesn’t make you less it makes you unique. She found favor and acceptance through looking into the eyes of the King instead of comparing herself with everyone else around her. I believe that she decided not to compete for a position that was already hers. You would be surprised at how many women end up there! She was able to withstand the challenge to a power struggle and never gave into the pressure to perform. Again, you’d be surprised at how many women end up there! Her response to the King was with words of the utmost sincerity, honesty and vulnerability. Now, as women, we all need to end up there!

Near the end of the last chapter in Song of Solomon, the Shulamite declares that she had found peace. Her self esteem was the second element that was a part of her finding it. Knowing that we are enough will not only help us win a serious war, it will also keep us from silly little battles that rob us of our time and energy. Next week's insight: #3 Her Attraction to Him!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

#1 Maturity Will Help Bring Peace

The teaching, “Then I Became in His Eyes as One who Found Peace”, is perspectives from the female point of view from the book: Song of Solomon. I shared some of this teaching a few years ago during a women’s conference at a local church. The teaching was born through a desire for a better relationship  between my husband and I. I have learned that you can be a good Christian, in love with God, and yet still be defeated in your relationships. I was defeated for a very long time in many ways until the Holy Spirit opened my eyes and revealed God’s word to me. There’s power in His word! Every application will bring a positive result. That is what separates the Bible from everything else you will ever read. These insights were life-changing for me and I know they will be for you too!


The Shulamite woman had everything in her life that most women desire. She had the King (which sounds like more than enough) and all of the pleasures of being his bride. Most of all, she had peace, which seems to be the very thing most women are lacking these days.

Seven Areas of Insight from the Study of the Shulamite Woman

Number One: Her Maturity

This might not seem like any information that is life-changing, but you’d be surprised how many little girls are walking around in women’s bodies. I always say, “Little girls are cute and fun to be around but they make horrible wives!” Don’t believe me? Just spend some time talking to a man who’s in a relationship with a grown woman who acts more like a child. Your husband is in need of a mature woman who can handle the pressures of life in the same way that the Shulamite woman was expected to handle the pressure of being married to the King.  Men need a responsible partner and want someone capable of helping them "build".  I’ve talked with many single women in the church who are hoping for a husband. They say to me, “I’m waiting for the King! “, I reply, “That’s great as long as you let God make you into queen material!” Never underestimate the ability of the King to discern the difference between a little princess and a real queen! Little princesses want to BE SERVED, but real queens SERVE.

Women who desire to be in a close relationship with a man need to be aware of every area of defeat in their life, especially areas of immaturity. Most men have a very low tolerance for “child like behavior” in women. Maturity will help bring peace. If you are single and you want to attract the right one, you must become the right one. The peace is in knowing that you’ve done your part so that God can do His. If you are a married woman, the peace is in knowing that you can change your attitude and you will be surprised at what will change after that!

Log on next week for INSIGHT # 2 from the study of the Shulamite Woman:  The Importance of Her Self-Esteem

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Men... Who needs them???

It doesn’t take a genius to recognize that people are more confused today about their relationships than ever before.  Women are bombarded with information about love and sex but aren’t convinced that they are getting all the facts.  They seem to have caught on that magazines from the checkout aisle are lacking depth about these subjects and they are now more inclined to seek the truth which can only be found in the Word of God.  This is a good thing.  I mean, it’s great that women are coming back to the Bible for answers and help.  The world’s contradiction is very noticeable as it sends messages that blatantly disdain men (especially tv sitcoms where men are portrayed as incapable and useless) and at the same time, give women tips and suggestions on how to entice and captivate one!  A great relationship between women and men will only be built upon the high value that God places on both sexes.

To begin this teaching, we must understand God’s design for women:  a normal woman would want to be loved and desired by a man.  It was His plan and His design for women.  I have had women shamefully confess to me at the altar that they wanted a husband.  They drop their head as if they were seeking the most inappropriate, hideous thing.  It would be humorous to me if it weren’t so sad.  I find it interesting that "the world" has tried to convince women that they don’t need a man and now they feel guilty that they want one.  Another disheartening situation that I have frequently witnessed is women who feel that their marriage is a lifeless, loveless, even hopeless situation.  They are not convinced that God will change things.  They seem to think that He could care less or that He is just not concerned with that part of their life..….Oh but He is…..that is why the Song of Solomon was included in the word of God!

In Song of Solomon, we see a couple who had everything good that God ordained for marriage.  They seem to have had a fairy tale romance and marriage but God’s word is no fairy tale book at all -- it is The Book of Truth!  God wants women to know that He desires for them to have the same type of intimacy and friendship with their husband that the Shulamite woman had with King Solomon.  It was written to be proof that awesome relationships not only exist but they are worth praying, waiting and working for.  Just like anything else though, we each have a responsibility to learn what the Word of God says and apply it to our lives in a daily walk.  I tell women, "God’s Word works:  if you don’t have what is says you can have then it’s because you are not doing what it tells you to do!"  His Word is a system, and like any good system, you must learn how to work it to get results.

I have and I am a personal testimony that great relationships can be built.  It’s good to know that we have been given a way to build one because most of us will not inherit one. You too can build something so awesome between you and your husband that will make others jealous - just kidding!!  I mean it will be a light and offer hope to others in a lonely world where people are desperately seeking help and wanting something lasting and real.  Get out the Bible, go to the book of Song of Solomon, and read it this week and I will begin the teaching in a few days…….come on its only eight chapters!!  It will probably be the most interesting and steamiest thing you’ve read all summer!

Loving U Like a Sister,
 
Regina

Then I became in His eyes as one who found Peace

Starting next week, I will begin sharing some of the material from my teaching entitled:  "Then I Became in His eyes as one who found Peace".  The teaching comes solely from the book of Song of Solomon. The material is basically a teaching on women’s sexuality and the feminine role.  Some church people get nervous when we enter these waters and a few women especially don’t seem to amen this kind of teaching.  I have often asked them, “in the sixties, when the world was yelling loudly for sexual deviance and spreading filth about human sexuality, why didn’t someone stand up and teach the truth?”  I have checked to see what the CHURCH was teaching young women back then and I cannot find a single word.  It seems the world had a loud, obnoxious voice and the church had no voice at all!

Coming from a background of sexual abuse, I had so many questions and so many areas of defeat in my life when I entered the church.  Not right away, but when I felt safe enough to ask for help, I didn’t get any.  I once asked a pastor’s wife about a certain passage in the Bible, as it seemed to pertain to my situation, but she couldn’t answer me.  She really didn’t know how to help me.  I then went to God and found out that He had a lot to say to women regarding sexuality.  That is when my personal journey of getting out of Egypt began!  Those that call on the name of the Lord shall be delivered.

Through the years, I have come to realize that there are countless numbers of women who struggle in the most intimate areas of their lives.  You’ll be glad to know that I’ve never asked God anything that His Spirit couldn’t help me find the answer to.  God has never been offended at any of my questions.  He is only offended at our unbelief.  God wants women to be helped and to know the truth.  You, as women, have confirmed that you are interested in learning how to come into a place of peace in your relationship with men.

The Bible has a lot to say about romance, sexual desire, personal responsibility, and loyal love!  Don’t think these subjects are interesting?  I assure you some day, if not now, your daughter will!  She will want to be loved and desired (hopefully in that order).  She will want to be “happy” and have a wonderful, fulfilling relationship with a man but it’s hard for our daughters to inherit what we don’t have.  We will all leave some kind of inheritance to our children.  Why not invest now into understanding and be able to pass it along with the rest of your "valuables".  Not only is she worth the investment but you might be surprised at how much help this teaching can really be to you!  I always say, "God can fix a small dent but He also works well with broken pieces!"  I am living proof.  For I truly have "become in his eyes as one who found peace".

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Whew!!! What a Situation!

So many times, we get into situations and wonder where God is.  We don’t feel like He has heard a word of our prayer and there are some of us who feel like he heard but refused to help us.  It really is times like these that develop faith in us.  I have noticed that it is easier to get people to read the word of God than to get them to trust it.  Unfortunately, reading the word of God alone will never develop faith in anyone.  I know women and men who have read the Bible regularly while in jail and prison (for a lack of anything else to read) and they never developed any faith.  Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.  Therefore, we must all be granted a situation where we cannot see the evidence but our hope is in the fact that God said He would do it!

I don’t know what your IT is today, but I know God.  I know that if He allowed it to be in His word, you can trust it.  I know that He is a healing, delivering, restoring, saving God!  I didn’t just read that He was all these things but I went into a situation with Him where it was developed in me that He is all these things.  I had a sickness situation, a bondage situation, a bad marriage situation, and above all, a "badly needing saved" situation.  God came through!  He proved that He was everything that His word said that He was.  I found out that God was bigger than all of my situations!

If you are in a situation today, check and see what the word of God says about it.  Ask God to help you renew your hope in Him.  Remember, there is a difference between wishing and hoping.  Wishing for God to move is just waiting. Hoping in God is waiting with an expectation!  Be like King David in the Bible, he expected to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.  You may not believe me right now, but some day you will thank God for the situation.  Without IT you would never know God beyond what you’ve READ Him to be instead of whom you will KNOW Him to be.  Those of us in the ministry probably testify more than we preach that He is certainly worth getting to know.  HE IS GOD!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Regarding Both Sides...

So many times, I have been asked by others (usually pastors) what my talents and gifts are.  Now, I hope you know the truth about answering such a question too quickly with a pastor or church leader.  I have learned through the years that one of the greatest talents in a good leader is the ability to delegate certain tasks to another to help free his hands!  Lol!  So I try to be very cautious when answering...  I also find it humorous that they would even ask such a thing because it seems like a set up for someone to brag on their self.  Imagine the conversation of “I am so wonderful at this and I can do this and this and this and ……." - yuk!   My answer has always been the same:  My greatest talent or skill has been the ability to get on my face before God.

Not impressed with such an answer?  I don’t believe some of them were neither!  Most people aren’t impressed with other people’s desire to be closed in with God on a regular basis.  I have also noticed that it seems to make people nervous as if a woman was being lofty or even mystical about doing such an endeavor.  Another thing too, is there seems to be a lack of regard for the other side no matter which side you are on.  The busy bees certainly do not admire the 'closed in", "reading the Bible all day long" types………. and the "closed in with God" certainly don’t admire the busy bee type. Yet the Lord found it fitting and useful to call both!

If we compare what we are doing with what others are doing then we might not think what we are doing is fitting at all.  I am convinced that God knows exactly what fits you for this season in your life.  If you are wearing the busy bee jacket…..Get 'er done!  If you have on a priestly robe….get on your face!  I've learned that spending time in both places cultivates a high regard for both sides.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Ownership OR Stewardship?

Good afternoon to those of the faith and to those of whom we remain hopeful. We are always reminded of those who never lost hope in us. I have often told the story (usually at revivals) of how my sister spent the night pounding the floor with her fist, praying for God to save me.  That was over fifteen years ago and, of course, He not only answered her but He did exceedingly above all that she could have asked or even hoped for.   She saw me as a sinner:  a sinner in need of an outstretched hand to save me because I was just about to go under, if you know what I mean.  Back then, she had never even imagined that God had a call on my life.  She just wanted me to be rescued and spared, but God had a bigger plan in mind.  He was working out a plan of chosen and set apart for the building of His Kingdom.

How many times have we looked at someone on the outside of the kingdom hopeful that they would just be spared?  We pray for God to save them.  We want them to be brought into the Kingdom and placed under the safety of "our great ministry" that God has entrusted us with (Lol) and then sure enough, it happens!  We are very proud that God has used US to help save one that was perishing.  We love the feeling of being needed and helping the weak.  They look up to us and we are elated!  Yes, we are their teacher and their leader...  I mean, their dependency on our ministry makes us feel like we are SOMEBODY!  What would they do without us or where would they go without our leadership?  Besides, they wouldn’t even be saved if it wasn’t for our intercession for them.  Hmmm...

The question for today is: “why did God save them”?  Every one of us was saved on purpose for a purpose.  In the ministry we should want people to become disciples and to move ahead into their call.  Why would we want people to remain ignorant or dependent on us?  Why would any leader want someone to remain in the state of just RESCUED and SPARED instead of CHOSEN and SET APART?  We have to be mindful of the fact that God's Kingdom is so much bigger than our specific area we're currenlty working in right now.  Do you know what I mean?  His kingdom is certainly bigger than the local church. 

I have learned that it is a great honor for God to allow US to disciple or even safeguard His anointed for a season.  It is a privilege for HIM to allow us to cover His chosen vessels for a set time.  We can contrast our ministry with that of Pharaoh’s daughter… She was chosen to find and raise Moses, ensuring him a good foundation, but at some point she had to let him go, because after all the BABY didn’t belong to her. He belonged to God.  We must let God be the owner of all that belongs to Him and we be found faithful in the stewardship of it.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Beyond Mere Existence!

Somehow this morning, I have this image in my mind of someone wasting their time trying to feed a dead horse instead of moving out to feed all the starving ponies.  Human nature is amazing to me. We all have that part of us that hates to break a familiar routine!  I mean, what is it about us that we hate to leave the familiar even when it is sooooo lifeless and doesn’t fulfill any part of our being?  Clinging to something that doesn’t offer a sense of fulfillment or satisfaction can lead us to a place of comforting our existence instead of living a life of accomplishment.  Anyone who has ever studied Psychology knows that stress is considered to be the spice of life.  We need a little bit of pressure to help us feel ALIVE!

Feeding a dead horse doesn’t take much effort at all.  Just show up!  Put down new hay and just pretend you don’t see that the other from yesterday is still there.  Press it down so there’s room to pile on more.   Now walk away and feel like you have done something profitable.  You will not even have to shovel away any OUTPUT (lol!), dead horses don’t produce any.  No fuss and no mess.  Easy as pie!  You didn’t even have to break a sweat.  What a life!  You’ve got it made.  But wait...  What about your feeling of accomplishment?  Where is that zeal you used to have?  Where is that feeling of knowing you really made a difference?

Now, on the other hand, getting outside that fence could be quite unsettling.  Oh the faith that it’s going to take to conquer the land of the “unknown”.  Wow!!  You’ll have to believe God for something you cannot see.  You will have to trust God more than ever before.  You will have to take God literally at HIS word.  What a thought!  What an idea!  I mean, letting yourself be put into a place of total dependency on God...  Why that’s like ……..that’s like ….living a life like people in the Bible!  Why that’s absurd isn’t it?  No, it isn't absurd at all...  It’s called living for God instead of existing for God.    Living for God will always lead us into situations that place new demands on our faith.  Existing for God rations the faith obtained long ago from past experiences hoping to have enough to get by.

Loving U Like a Sister,
 
Regina

A Matter of the Heart...

One of my favorite things to do is sit and talk with elderly people.  I find their detailed accounts of past experiences captivating!  A few years back, I sat and listened to a man in his ninety’s tell me all about the life that he had lived.  He told me of his long career working for Pepsi and how he had spent many of his days traveling different roads to different towns.  He had me convinced that his memories of yesterday were vivid and accurate.  Wow! The changes that he had seen throughout his life time... Imagine in ninety plus years, the development we call progress that had taken place.  His contrast of the past and present didn’t seem to have any bias nor did I detect any negativity or bitterness about the changes he’d witnessed.  He just recollected what and how it used to be but he never disputed that the present was any worse or better than the past.


I am not saying that he didn’t miss the “good old Days".  I am saying though, that it seemed to me that he was clever enough to be able to adjust himself to his environment for the sake of survival.  I got the impression that he wasn’t the kind of man who would just lie down and die because life refused to stand still to please his sentiment.  Through the years he moved with the movement.  When things became modern, he bought modern.  Do you know what I mean?  He bought a modern car and put in a phone.  He bought a television and many modern appliances for his wife.  He took advantage of what was made convenient and kept living his life for God.   He understood that his devotion to serve God was a matter of the heart and not a matter of what was available.

Through the years sin took advantage over the phone, the television, and even cars (gossip, sexual immorality, drunk driving, etc.).  It doesn’t seem like the enemy has left anything out or alone.  Yet in all these things, the old man had prevailed against the enemy in his walk with God.  How?  HE UNDERSTOOD THAT HIS DEVOTION TO SERVE GOD WAS A MATTER OF THE HEART AND NOT A MATTER OF WHAT WAS AVAILABLE!  Our choice to follow Jesus will always be based on our desire for Him more than a desire for what the world offers.  There will always be enticement and there will always be avenues to sin.  The fact remains: we are still drawn away more by what’s in our heart than by what’s in our face!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Are You Sure You Know What You're Doing??

Have you ever tried to explain a personal revelation from God to someone else?  Unfortunately, I have tried many times.  I have learned that there is power in revelation but only to the one God intended on directing!  I remember years ago when the Holy Spirit directed me to home school my kids and I tried to help our family and friends understand what I was doing.  I gave reason after reason as I was trying to convince them that I was doing the right thing.  The problem was I wasn’t sure why God had led me to home school but I was sure that HE had.  Now all of these several years later I understand perfectly! God gave back so much during that time with my kids that had been lost in previous years of sin.


Being led by God is very difficult to explain to another.  We have all probably heard the phrases a time or two:  "I felt led" or, "I just don’t feel led!"  How many times have we heard it abused or misused by someone not wanting to accept responsibility for peculiar behavior or lack of desire? Yet the fact remains that HE does still lead His people in and out of places and positions.  He lays things on our hearts and draws us in ways that can cause us to feel foolish when we explain them to others.  He moves and deals with us.  He burdens and, at times, consumes us.  All this is better than those seasons where we kind of think He might be ignoring us!

Are you in a season of being led but finding it hard to explain?  Trying to explain the leading of the Holy Spirit in your life to other people is wearisome, to say the least!  Being led by God is stepping out in faith not sight. How can we make someone see what we don't see clearly yet ourselves?   Even the things God allows you to see wouldn’t make sense to other people.  So what’s the solution?  Be led by God and learn to give an account only to those of whom it is required.  We all have people in our lives that are over us in some way or another.  I call them Kings but don’t go around kinging everybody!  lol!!  When you have really searched out the will of God with fasting and prayer, He will come through. 

What has God led you to do?  Do you feel moved?  Has God put something on your heart?  Has He compelled you in any way?  If you are waiting for everyone to understand it before you move then be prepared for misery!  Doubt brings along frustration but peace always hangs out with faith.  I would rather be at peace with God than have the approval of a bunch of people who cannot direct their own life, much less mine!

Loving U Like a Sister,
 
Regina

Where are the Titus 2 Women?

We (my family and I) attended an awesome 2000-seated church on Sunday.  The service was contemporary, of course, strategically structured and precise.  I was extremely impressed with the speaker. He was solid!  I did notice a very similar situation in this contemporary church that I see in the traditional assembly though. When they gave out the announcements there was an event for women’s ministry coming up and they apologized that there had not been anything for women in a long time.  I thought how sad it is for the church when women’s teaching is so few and far between. 

Paul plainly stated in Titus 2 that the older women needed to be involved in teaching women in specific areas of their life.  If you look at the magazine racks in the checkout area of stores you would easily see what women need to be taught and where their interests are.  You would see that Paul knew that women were needed to help teach on women’s issues such as their relationship with their husband and children, discretion, chastity and so forth.  Women struggle in very intimate areas of their personal life and need the help that only another woman can offer.

I have seen pastors (men) try to teach in these areas.  I guess for a lack of female teachers they try and do what they can but it is so distasteful to say the least!  We need some women in the church to be more concerned with women’s ministry.  I am not talking about crafts and the keeping of the cleaning schedule.  I am talking about Titus 2 women who understand that women need to be encouraged and admonished in the things that really pertain to women.  God is not concerned with whether a woman can make a quilt but He is concerned about the feminine role in general.  I can tell you:  we think that women understand their identity better than they used to, but they don't - they actually understand it less!   The younger generation of women are more confused than they have ever been.  The older women in the church have so much more to offer than what they are giving.

It is in the local assembly that women's lives will be changed.  Don't rely on a one time event to take the place of training that comes from consistency and the daily routine.  We raise our children, relying on consistency to shape and build who they will become.  We wouldn't expect one youth event to take the place of daily parenting.  We expect special events to enhance what we have taught.  That's what I am saying about women's ministry in the local church.  It is needed regularly.  Put a high value on the women in your church.  Get involved with helping them.  Teach and please make it accessible (remember the need for childcare and flexible schedules).  Women are worth the investment!!

Loving U Like a Sister,
 
Regina

It Rains Here Because He Reigns Here!

Often in church I hear people say, “Well, it rains on the just and the unjust”.  I understand their use of this scripture as they are trying to help someone who is facing trials and they want them to see that we are none exempt from bad days or "rainy days".   Really though, when God allowed it to rain on His people it was a good thing.  Rain was needed for the growth and harvest of what was being produced. Without rain everything would dry up.  It wasn’t that God was being evil, allowing the bad into the just people’s lives, it was that God was being merciful allowing GOOD into the unjust people’s lives.


Do you know that those of us who belong to God have the potential to rain onto other people? We have the Holy Spirit living in us!  His Words are waters of life!  Don’t you love to be around people that are full of God’s Spirit?   Don’t you hate to be around dry people who offer nothing to your spirit but dust?  How much more important is it though to become a source of life than to always be searching for others to provide it?  Do you know what I mean?  Too many times, we go out searching for a place where the water is really on the move instead of determining to BE a place where the water is really on the move!

Today if you are complaining about things drying up in your area make sure that you are still a good source.  If the Holy Spirit still has reign in your house then you can be sure that there’s rain there!  I have learned whether or not it’s raining at church or at another’s house is not as important as whether it’s raining at mine. As long as I have THE source of the waters of life with me I can bring the showers wherever I go! We do indeed need the rain but instead of complaining about where it cannot be found let’s do our best to carry it to the dry, dead ground...

Loving U Like a Sister,
 
Regina

Zealous for the House of God?

Good Morning!  In the word of God there is a passage that says, “zeal for your house has eaten me up”. In the New Testament, Jesus went into the temple and ran out the merchants. He not only ran them out but overthrew their tables! He was ZEALOUS for the house of God. It was certainly a time when you saw the lamb become a lion!

Today, I am wondering if you are zealous for what goes on in God’s house. In the past few years I have seen countless numbers of people trying to sell themselves or their merchandise in the church! I am not so aggravated by their trying to sell to the church as much as I am for their manipulation. Let’s face it: all of us want to earn a decent living… Many of us either have kids in college now or they will be attending in a few years. Most of us are looking to get ahead or just stay ahead whether in continuing our education or business opportunities but please, not at the expense or the integrity of the church!

Don’t try to flatter or manipulate God’s people just to make a sale... Don’t be a fake and try to develop relationships based on anything other than your sincerity! I have a great Idea... Let’s get more concerned about souls being saved! Let’s make disciples of Jesus’ followers and not customers! I know that this is a little more than blogging… But God’s church should be called a house of prayer. Who wants to come into a “market place atmosphere” where everyone is after you for a selfish reason or ulterior motive? Be real with me! I don’t care if you accept or reject me, just be real about it. We shouldn’t let people continue to manipulate the church for selfish gain.

My prayer is that the leaders in the local churches would take a stand against marketing in the church house. I personally could tell you of many situations of young converts being sought after and preyed upon by church members. I had to really hold my tongue as I watched a pastor and his wife manipulate a dear young friend of mine a few years back. I was so limited on what I could say because it was more of a gut feeling I had and I wasn’t sure of what I should say. They took her for close to fifteen hundred dollars for a “Business Opportunity”!

She never saw a dime of it back and she had small children to feed and buy diapers for. She trusted them because they were her leaders. Sometimes as women we want to be pleasing to those who are positioned over us. Do you know what I mean? We love the support and need the affirmation they offer. I call it an abuse of authority! I will also call it tacky when church members try to use the LOVE connection that Jesus gives us as a BUSINESS connection. I might make you mad today. I hope I make you mad enough to pray about it! I love all of God’s children but I will look after the weak and I pray that I will always be able to differentiate between good and evil. I pray that all of us as ministers will never stop being zealous for the HOUSE of GOD.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina