Woman... God's Good Thing! - Introduction

Woman…God’s Good Thing

An In-depth Look into Femininity from Proverbs 31

Ever noticed how “it’s a boy” or ‘it’s a girl” seems to have lost its distinctiveness?  Not too long ago, there was a certain expectation that seem to accompany one’s sex.  Do you know what I mean?  There was a celebration over the specific sex of that child being born and an understanding as to what that new person would offer in their role to the family and society.  A boy would be celebrated as one who would bring strength and leadership.  He would carry the family name into future generations.  A girl would be celebrated as one who would bring beauty and nurturing.  She would be the one who would carry life in her very own body into future generations.

Oh that we could get back to the celebration of masculinity and femininity!  The gifting and ability that has been given to both sexes should be looked into with much appreciation, wonderment, and respect.  God has never once changed His idea of what is to be expected from His creation.  A little boy will grow up to be a man and God will hold him accountable according to His design and expectation for him.  A little girl will grow up and become a woman and God will hold her accountable to His design and expectation for her.  He places a high value on both male and female but has a required role for both of His design.

One thing that’s quite clear these days is that there is a lot of confusion as to what the design and role of a woman is.  The image of femininity has been somewhat distorted over time and our role models seem to be disappearing at an alarming rate.  There’s confusion in both the home and church as to what is the God given role for a woman.  Women want to know where the boundaries are and where would be crossing the line?  In just the last century alone the boundary for women was moved so many times that now we’re not sure where to stand.  Everything has been argued (without clarity or remedy) from women working outside the home to the length of our sleeve and the hem of our dress.  Yet still, most women try to fit into a mold of something we’ve heard or seen that looks or feels like it might be accepted.

So where is our help and where is our understanding?  As in everything else, it’s in the Lord who made the heavens and earth and all that is in it (yes, women too). The Bible is the complete authority and reference to what God had in mind when He made a woman. Femininity has its own personality, excellence, and skill.  Before we begin the next segment, look into the mirror and see “the woman” and understand that this is your identity.  Your identity is not what you do it’s what you are.  I will use myself as an example:  “I am a woman who happens to be a minister”, not “a minister who happens to be a woman.”  My identity is that I’m a woman.  My greatest fulfillment and pleasures in life will come from the things pertaining to women not ministers.  Therefore, occupying the earth will be centered on the fact that I am A Woman… Log on in two days as we begin our look into the life of the Proverb 31 Woman.

Loving U like a Sister,

Regina

I'm Glad that God Uses Weak Things!

Have you ever asked God to change your nature into something that’s a little easier for you to deal with?

Through the years, God has changed many things in my life.  He has given back and restored many things that were broken, lost or stolen in my past years of sin.  He has healed many relationships in my life especially the ones that were needed mostly (my relationship with my husband and father).  He has changed my attitude, outlook and desires.  He has given me faith and several opportunities to build upon it.  He has given me the land and so many times, He has personally chosen to give me the morning (the newness that only He can bring).  Yet in all these things, I have not convinced Him to change my nature.  This person in me, or this personality that I carry around, is just not impressive.  Oh the times I thought that if I could convince God to let me be another or let me trade personalities with another, then I would have it made and life would be so much easier.  All my insecurities would be gone!

There is a major problem with the idea of trading natures though...  If God were to speak today and give me permission to trade with someone else, which one would I choose?  Finding someone who has no personality flaws would be tough.  Where could I find someone who has no weakness in his or her flesh?  Is there anyone out there who is completely confident and proficient in every area of their life?  I have been searching for a while but I’ve found none.  It seems we all have a weakness.  Some people are just better at covering up more than others.  I have lived long enough to know that you can train your responses to be acceptable in front of others but all of us have something in our “natural blood” to contend with.

One thing you can be sure of today is that God does care about you and the weakness in your flesh.  He may not ever change it because it may be the very thing that keeps you depending on His Strength.  He doesn’t leave it there to torment you.  God uses weak places to show Himself strong.  The only people who are ever defeated by personal weaknesses are the ones who refuse to give them over to God.  He has proved over and over again that His grace is sufficient for all of us.  I was reading a book by Robert A. Schuller a few days ago and I couldn’t help but laugh at his detailed listing of the people in the Bible.  He started out with Noah was a drunk, Abraham was too old, Isaac was a daydreamer, Jacob was a liar, Joseph was abused, Moses stuttered, Gideon was afraid and I’m sure you get the point of his list!

My point today is don’t let the weakness in you be your excuse for not trying and stop thinking that you are the only one.  Don’t waste time wishing you were someone else.  They too have a weakness.  Give everything that is in you to GOD.  He can use you and when it comes to your weakness, He will most likely use IT too!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

#6 Her Understanding of True Love

#6  Her Understanding of True Love - the continued study of the Shulamite woman from the series "Then I Became in His Eyes as One Who Found Peace"

I am convinced that at least half, if not more than half, of the world is clueless to the meaning of true love.  We have piles of love songs, poems, books and movies that portray the romantic notions of love, but very few icons where its depth and true meaning are clearly seen or defined.  This is a sad truth because if we live in a society that only understands love in the concept of romantic feelings then we are all in trouble.  Young men and women who don’t understand the difference between emotion and devotion will never have any quality relationships.  These young men and women I am referring to could easily end up being our children and grandchildren.

One of the most admonishing passages to young women from Song of Solomon is the words of the Shulamite woman: “His banner over me was love”.  She was fully convinced of the king’s love for her.  Not only could she identify it, but she obviously knew the importance of pointing it out to the younger women who were following her example.  She understood the value that the king had placed on her by making her his bride.  His banner over her was obvious and identifiable by the engagement and ceremony as well as the wedding night.  His banner over her was love, not lust.  The Shulamite was able to return and validate the King’s desire for her because of her knowledge and proof of his banner.  No woman should ever accept a man’s desire for her without it being inside the boundary of true love.

A man’s desire for a woman without the shelter of love can easily end up in disaster.  Desire alone has the potential to rob, devour and devastate a woman.  God gave men a STRONG desire for women but He only gave it legal access under the banner of love.  Why?  Because God knew that a man acting within his desire wouldn’t be much more than a taker but, in love, he would want to protect and give to her as well.  What a brilliant God!  Pretty good set up if you ask me. 

God never intended on women being used or abused and there are certainly women who have ended up in both situations unaware and unintentionally. Truthfully though, we all know of someone (maybe even us) who decided to go into a relationship without checking or even acknowledging what his banner over them (or us) really was.  It is not as difficult as we sometimes make it out to be.  Identifying the banner can be as simple as asking a few good questions.  Is there a ring or a wedding date?  What is his banner over you, love or something else?  I have learned that women who understand true love will not settle for anything less, but women who lack understanding will settle for just being desired time and time again.  Be smart and remain in peace like the Shulamite woman...  His banner over her was love.  She understood and so should you.

Log on next week for the final study of the Shulamite woman and how to find peace in  #7, "Her Responsibility to the Younger Generation".

Loving U like A sister,

Regina

Regarding Both Sides...

So many times, I have been asked by others (usually pastors) what my talents and gifts are.  Now, I hope you know the truth about answering such a question too quickly with a pastor or church leader.  I have learned through the years that one of the greatest talents in a good leader is the ability to delegate certain tasks to another to help free his hands!  Lol!  So I try to be very cautious when answering...  I also find it humorous that they would even ask such a thing because it seems like a set up for someone to brag on their self.  Imagine the conversation of “I am so wonderful at this and I can do this and this and this and ……." - yuk!   My answer has always been the same:  My greatest talent or skill has been the ability to get on my face before God.

Not impressed with such an answer?  I don’t believe some of them were neither!  Most people aren’t impressed with other people’s desire to be closed in with God on a regular basis.  I have also noticed that it seems to make people nervous as if a woman was being lofty or even mystical about doing such an endeavor.  Another thing too, is there seems to be a lack of regard for the other side no matter which side you are on.  The busy bees certainly do not admire the 'closed in", "reading the Bible all day long" types………. and the "closed in with God" certainly don’t admire the busy bee type. Yet the Lord found it fitting and useful to call both!

If we compare what we are doing with what others are doing then we might not think what we are doing is fitting at all.  I am convinced that God knows exactly what fits you for this season in your life.  If you are wearing the busy bee jacket…..Get 'er done!  If you have on a priestly robe….get on your face!  I've learned that spending time in both places cultivates a high regard for both sides.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Ownership OR Stewardship?

Good afternoon to those of the faith and to those of whom we remain hopeful. We are always reminded of those who never lost hope in us. I have often told the story (usually at revivals) of how my sister spent the night pounding the floor with her fist, praying for God to save me.  That was over fifteen years ago and, of course, He not only answered her but He did exceedingly above all that she could have asked or even hoped for.   She saw me as a sinner:  a sinner in need of an outstretched hand to save me because I was just about to go under, if you know what I mean.  Back then, she had never even imagined that God had a call on my life.  She just wanted me to be rescued and spared, but God had a bigger plan in mind.  He was working out a plan of chosen and set apart for the building of His Kingdom.

How many times have we looked at someone on the outside of the kingdom hopeful that they would just be spared?  We pray for God to save them.  We want them to be brought into the Kingdom and placed under the safety of "our great ministry" that God has entrusted us with (Lol) and then sure enough, it happens!  We are very proud that God has used US to help save one that was perishing.  We love the feeling of being needed and helping the weak.  They look up to us and we are elated!  Yes, we are their teacher and their leader...  I mean, their dependency on our ministry makes us feel like we are SOMEBODY!  What would they do without us or where would they go without our leadership?  Besides, they wouldn’t even be saved if it wasn’t for our intercession for them.  Hmmm...

The question for today is: “why did God save them”?  Every one of us was saved on purpose for a purpose.  In the ministry we should want people to become disciples and to move ahead into their call.  Why would we want people to remain ignorant or dependent on us?  Why would any leader want someone to remain in the state of just RESCUED and SPARED instead of CHOSEN and SET APART?  We have to be mindful of the fact that God's Kingdom is so much bigger than our specific area we're currenlty working in right now.  Do you know what I mean?  His kingdom is certainly bigger than the local church. 

I have learned that it is a great honor for God to allow US to disciple or even safeguard His anointed for a season.  It is a privilege for HIM to allow us to cover His chosen vessels for a set time.  We can contrast our ministry with that of Pharaoh’s daughter… She was chosen to find and raise Moses, ensuring him a good foundation, but at some point she had to let him go, because after all the BABY didn’t belong to her. He belonged to God.  We must let God be the owner of all that belongs to Him and we be found faithful in the stewardship of it.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

A Matter of the Heart...

One of my favorite things to do is sit and talk with elderly people.  I find their detailed accounts of past experiences captivating!  A few years back, I sat and listened to a man in his ninety’s tell me all about the life that he had lived.  He told me of his long career working for Pepsi and how he had spent many of his days traveling different roads to different towns.  He had me convinced that his memories of yesterday were vivid and accurate.  Wow! The changes that he had seen throughout his life time... Imagine in ninety plus years, the development we call progress that had taken place.  His contrast of the past and present didn’t seem to have any bias nor did I detect any negativity or bitterness about the changes he’d witnessed.  He just recollected what and how it used to be but he never disputed that the present was any worse or better than the past.


I am not saying that he didn’t miss the “good old Days".  I am saying though, that it seemed to me that he was clever enough to be able to adjust himself to his environment for the sake of survival.  I got the impression that he wasn’t the kind of man who would just lie down and die because life refused to stand still to please his sentiment.  Through the years he moved with the movement.  When things became modern, he bought modern.  Do you know what I mean?  He bought a modern car and put in a phone.  He bought a television and many modern appliances for his wife.  He took advantage of what was made convenient and kept living his life for God.   He understood that his devotion to serve God was a matter of the heart and not a matter of what was available.

Through the years sin took advantage over the phone, the television, and even cars (gossip, sexual immorality, drunk driving, etc.).  It doesn’t seem like the enemy has left anything out or alone.  Yet in all these things, the old man had prevailed against the enemy in his walk with God.  How?  HE UNDERSTOOD THAT HIS DEVOTION TO SERVE GOD WAS A MATTER OF THE HEART AND NOT A MATTER OF WHAT WAS AVAILABLE!  Our choice to follow Jesus will always be based on our desire for Him more than a desire for what the world offers.  There will always be enticement and there will always be avenues to sin.  The fact remains: we are still drawn away more by what’s in our heart than by what’s in our face!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Who are you?

Hello friends!  A question for today:  Who are you?  Do you know that it has taken me 40 years to be able to answer this question.  The Holy Spirit led me back to "my Genesis" (when God created me) and strategically walked me back through every place I had been wounded.  We found pieces of me all over the place!  He has helped me understand that self-identity is at the root of every decision we make.  The choice of a spouse, career, religion and even simple things like clothing depict our identification of SELF.

Knowing who "you are" is critical to "your" success!  Acknowledging your weakness can help you be vigilant and wiser to guard that area.  Awareness of your abilities and strength will help give you the confidence to go into new territories.  Being mindful of your areas of sensitivity can help you pinpoint your motivation.  And of course, studying your heart's desire can help you understand your greatest need.

There are many situations in the Bible where someone, after being approached, asked the other "who are you?" (some examples:  Moses & God; Jacob & angel; S(P)aul & Jesus).  We understand their relationship wouldn't go any further until they identified who they were dealing with.  We tend to be the same whether in business, church or our personal lives.  We want to know the people before we enter a close relationship with them.  What I am saying though is that we will do better in all these areas if we really get to know SELF first!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina