Her words, “Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm; for love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave; its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame”…… The Shulamite woman understood the anguish and passion of jealousy. She understood that there would be enticements that would pull for the king’s affection. She also understood that there would be distractions that would pull for his time. It’s interesting though, she never gave up her right to feel protective over their relationship. Her request for the king’s devotion and commitment to her wasn’t childish or brazen. Her desire seems to be more in line with what God requires in His relationships from all of us.
In the Bible, we learn of God’s character, standard, and will. He proclaims that He is a jealous God. He is mindful of worldly competition and expects our complete attachment and devotion to Him. God is Holy and has neither thought nor action that is in any way evil or carnal. Yet, He is jealous over our relationship with Him. So as a wife, we too can have a proper respect for jealousy that is not based on anything hateful or insecure but on protectiveness and wisdom.
The Shulamite woman had a respect for jealousy that she used to her advantage. She understood that the closer she got to the king, the better the relationship would be. Intimacy in marriage is a major defense against many enemies. Because of jealousy, she was vigilant and fervent to do everything in her power to stay on his mind and in his heart (I could give you a lot of good suggestions here, but I'll let you use your own imagination!). Back in her time, the seal was a symbol of her being his possession. She loved the idea of completely belonging to him! We have come a long way, haven’t we? Have we? lol!
So, these days, wives contend with husbands who have business opportunities, ministry opportunities, recreational opportunities, and many, many other opportunities! Some of these opportunities have the potential to defraud the wife (and the entire family, for that matter) in one way or another (I'm only speaking balance, not restriction). What’s a girl to do? Harden your heart and say, "why bother"? Silence will probably cost you more in the long run. Many women in their later days spew out poison from what was held back in their former days. Just being quiet about something and being at peace with something is not the same thing. Pretending not to be bothered will show up again in the form of bitterness and hate when you least expect it.
The Shulamite woman found peace through speaking her heart to her husband and voicing her jealousy. She not only voiced her concern with jealousy but she respected it enough to let it motivate her toward working on a closer relationship with him. Maybe you too could benefit from identifying how you feel about jealousy. You don’t have to drown in it to respect it. It could be a great tool to help you become an even greater wife. Believe it or not, it could be one of the key factors hidden in your marriage that helps bring peace.
Log on next week and find out more about the Shulamite woman and how to find peace in study #6, "Her Understanding of True Love".
Loving U Like a Sister,
Regina
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