Esther - Upon My Honor - Ending

The last segment in this series is “the honor of not having to be first.”  No doubt about it, we live in a “me first” society.   But today, how many of us understand that society’s way of doing things and God’s way of doing things are totally different?  The world says, “Push your way through and look out for number one!”  But God says, “Look out for one another and the first shall be last.”   Being second is the main idea behind Christianity, even though sometimes the concept is easily forgotten.  In the daily routine of living, we can easily turn the focus back onto us.  Many of us need reminding from time to time (myself included) that a “me first” attitude rarely prospers and seldom turns out well.  Esther showed honor by living a life that unmistakably relayed the message, “Me second.”

Because of God and a few honorable people, the book of Esther has a great ending.  Esther saves the Jews!  Well… God saved the Jews, but He used Esther to do so.  It’s very interesting to me that the story doesn’t end with the focus on Esther but on Mordecai’s promotion.  Her risk and sacrifice helped move Mordecai into a new position right next to the king.   Even though she was queen, Mordecai’s advancement placed him ahead of her.  It’s worth mentioning that his new position was considered second as well (only second to the king).  Do you mind being second no matter how much you labor or how much sacrifice you have put into a thing?  In the natural, I believe that it would bother most people to labor for someone else’s promotion and that the whole idea of being second would be disheartening.  But Esther shows us that being second can be very valuable and offers its own reward.

Helping to promote one that you are in a close relationship with, well, that’s just wisdom!  Their success will ultimately mean yours (great message to wives).  And helping to advance or promote people who are godly and filled with godly ideas…  Well, how can that be anything but honorable?   Sadly, many people pass up awesome opportunities to be a part of something successful all because of not being the one who gets to be “number one.”  And the reality is that relationships will die, marriages will fail and families will fall apart where there isn’t at least one person who is okay with being second.   The definition of second: Next after the first; inferior; one who supports another; to follow next in place; to support; to join with in proposing some measure.

In my opinion, Esther is one of the most honorable women in the Bible.  Everything that she was a part of prospered and grew.  None of her relationships were divided, broken or dead.   She showed worth and value to everyone (not only to those who were considered to be great).  She was in “it” for more than just herself.   Her trust was in God and not in her own ability.  She showed discretion and cautiously waited for God’s timing.  And she seemed pleased and content to help promote others.   She made “being second” look good and helped us see that “second” is very important to God.   The first mention of Esther was her being brought into the kingdom with many other beautiful women.  But she had much more to offer than just her outward appearance.   Even though she was young, she had somehow learned a very valuable wisdom along her journey.  She exemplified a profound wisdom that every woman, no matter where she’s from, needs to know… Beauty may very well move a man or even a king… But HONOR will move the hand of God.    “Upon my Honor” reveals that she knew which one was the greater.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Esther - Upon My Honor (Part 4)

When it comes to discretion…    It’s not that I have been  "perfected" but I press on toward the mark of a higher calling.   And though we see Esther showing discretion at an early age, for most women, learning to be discreet will take some time.  I mean, how many of us at the first approach would have blurted out, “oh King live forever Haman is evil” in the same breath.   But instead, she invited King Ahasuerus to come and dine with her as she waited for a more appropriate time to seek his help.   Note that she didn’t tell him about her problem the second time that they were together either.  She did eventually get around to telling him about Haman and the wicked plan to have her people annihilated… But she showed great restraint as she waited…  I know that it wasn’t so much to her credit as it was to God, but the same could be said of you and me today.

Because of what Paul wrote to Titus in the New Testament, I know that being discreet doesn’t have to be something that we are born with, but can be something that is taught.  And I have learned that what seems to be lacking in one’s nature or intellect can be recovered by the Spirit of God.   Some natures have "this" and some bloodlines have "that" but God’s Spirit has everything.  God doesn’t consider it a lack of honor when someone seems to be missing a very “appropriate” trait but He does consider it most honorable when we acknowledge it and seek Him for help.   Esther’s prudence is definitely something to be admired but know that everyone can be helped to discern and taught to answer cautiously by learning to lean on God.

As a child, I wasn’t taught much, if anything, about discretion nor did I seem to inherit any.  I remember when I first noticed the trait in a girl from my sixth grade class. She and I were both chosen to represent our school for a Social Studies fair.  We decided that she should be the spokesperson for our project.  She knew exactly what to say and exactly what not to say to the judges and then later, as she explained the results to our sixth grade teacher (cautiously leaving some details OUT).  As I watched her, I knew that she had something that I lacked, and even as a child, I knew that it was something that I needed.

No matter where you sit, it’s very easy to get aggravated with people who seem to be ignorant or lack discretion.  I have sat in both places… getting on other’s nerves and other’s getting on mine!    I can tell you though, "God will never require us to put anything on the altar or bring anything forward that we don’t have."  He doesn’t judge us as harshly as some would have you think.  Man will require much more from our performance than God will.   He knows what we have in us and He knows what we lack.  He calls us “His” anyway.   He knows that His Spirit can make up all the difference.    So it’s not so much a woman’s discretion that is honorable… But it’s in her desire to learn to be discreet and in her humility to seek God for what she lacks.

Loving U like A Sister,

Regina

Esther - Upon My Honor (Part 3)

Another great example of Esther’s ability to show honor is:  she never showed any signs of self-sufficiency.   Esther put her trust in God and not in her own abilities.   Esther didn’t seem to struggle nor wrestle with the idea that she was enough to make things happen on her own.  When the pressure was on she sought the help of God through prayer and fasting.   When she was challenged by Mordecai to break royal protocol and to go before the king uninvited, she never relied on anything other than the hand of God.  Esther obviously knew that the king liked her but she also knew that a lot was riding on such a great risk so she chose not to depend upon anything in the natural.  In other words, she knew that she needed the help of a higher power that exceeded her beauty and natural charm. 

One of the first things that God will do in a Christian’s life is to deliver us from the idea that we are enough on our own.    Many people are programmed at a young age that they can make anything happen if they have enough self-confidence and a strong enough will (self-confidence is not to be confused with self-esteem).  The Bible teaches us that we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength.  Thinking that we can do it in our own strength is not only naïve but it is also dishonorable toward God.  No matter how good it makes you look or how safe it makes you feel, God will never allow things in your life that replace Him.   He wants to be the security in every part of your life.  Therefore, each and every one of us will have to go through seasons of giving up those things that stand between us and Him.  Our help comes from the Lord who made the heavens and the earth; to look elsewhere or to trust in any other would be futile.   

For such a young woman, Esther showed that she had an outstanding concept of how to show honor.  She honored people without showing partiality.   She honored and valued all human life.  She knew how to honor rank, leaders, and positions.  And today we see that she knew how to show honor to God.   Esther proved that her trust was in God and not in anything that she thought she was or in anything that she thought she could do.  She never showed any signs of being self-confident.   Remember Esther the next time you feel bad about lacking confidence.    Remember her example and how it’s always more honorable to be God-confident!    He’s the one who can make things happen.  Next week-the honor of being discreet...

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Upon My Honor - Esther (Part 2)

Besides treating others significantly, another attribute of honor is:  Being in “it” to help others, not just to look good or feel good about yourself.   Selfish ambition will give up quickly and will not keep you for the long haul in anything.   When our desire is to really help others, we are less likely to become discouraged over the process of time.  Having a real burden for people will keep you through the difficult times but any motivation that is based on vain desire will not be enough to keep you from quitting right in the middle of something.  Esther proved that she was in "it" for more than just her comfort, status or safety.  She was made completely aware that her freedom came with a great price and that helping the others could possibly be the reason that she had been given such an awesome opportunity.

Even though His name is never mentioned, God’s power and plan is evident throughout the entire book of Esther.  We not only see that He had a plan but we also see His foreknowledge of everyone that He would use.  God knows perfectly who to choose for what.  He knew that Esther would be obedient to His call, surrendered to His plan, and overwhelmed by the burden for the loss of her people.  He knew that she would want to help and that her passion to save them would be strong enough to move her into taking great risks; and, of course, He knew that He couldn’t and wouldn’t even come close to failing her or letting her down.  He sovereignly orchestrated the events of Esther's life; letting her be brought into the kingdom, giving her the position and crown and eventually using her to save many people.  

Esther won the hearts of everyone around her because she had already won the heart of God.  And no one, not even a King, can withstand a woman who has the hand of God all over her.   Has anyone ever just liked you or just randomly offered to help you as you walked away wondering why?   Well, now you know that it was probably the hand of God.  I have learned that If God likes you then He will cause the right people to like you too.   He knows how to direct our steps and how to send certain people along the way to offer us their assistance.  Seems like everybody liked Esther and that everybody wanted to help her.   But it wasn’t anything to do with anything other than God.   Do you know what I mean?  It was God’s foresight, plan and agenda.   Esther was chosen as part of that plan because God knew that He could trust her.  She was given a place of honor because she showed honor. God already knew that she wasn’t the kind of girl who would be in “it” just for herself...   He knew that she would be in “it” to help others.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Upon My Honor - Esther

Last week, we studied the one who showed no honor (Vashti) and we learned what not to do.   This week let’s study the one who showed great honor and learn more about what we should do.  Showing someone honor is to treat them as “significant.”  Esther treated everyone around her as if they were greatly significant.   One thing that will distinguish “honorable women” from others is that they tend to treat people the same, no matter who those people seem to be or not be.  Honorable people aren’t consumed with the idea of recognition or advancement and regularly practice “not showing partiality toward selective people.”  It’s not that they don’t want to move up or become more successful… they understand that God is the one who is in charge of promotion and He would never give anyone a greater opportunity to become a better snob!  Lol!  Do you know what I mean?  There’s nothing honorable about sucking up to the people you think to be “somebody” all the while ignoring those you consider to be of less importance.   

Even though he may not have appeared so at first, one of the most important people in Esther’s life was Hegai (the eunuch) who was placed in charge of her care.  She won his favor instantly by treating him with respect and honor.  Her honor is seen in her obedience to his instruction (don’t bother trying to fake honor with the right smile and speech if you are not going to respect and follow instruction).   Esther treated him like he was somebody worth listening to and she proved it by doing what he said.   Imagine how her relationship with him would have failed had she treated him as if he was just one of the king’s mere servants.   Hegai was the one who helped her win the king’s favor (Hegai had experience and a longer relationship with the king so he could direct her in what the king liked).  Something worth remembering today:  Many times it’s our regard for “mere servants” that help us win the favor of God; and with God’s favor comes reward, which generally includes a better position.

True honor can only come from a place of understanding humility, gratitude and our own self-worth.  Women who are unthankful about their own life have a difficult time showing honor because they always feel left out or that there’s “nothing in it” for them … Women who have low self-esteem will be confused thinking that showing honor is somehow an admittance that they are of lesser value…  And of course, women who are prideful will never feel the need to further empower any leader’s assumption that they are esteemed higher or outrank them. Lol!     Esther showed humility by allowing others to instruct and help her.  She showed that she found value in all people (even servants).  She respected the positions and opinions of others.  She proved that she knew how to show honor.  What a girl!  Log in next week and find out how her honor won the king and ultimately the crown!

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Upon My Honor - Queen Vashti

Let’s begin “Upon My Honor” with the one who refused to show any.  I remember reading Esther as a young Christian and thinking that Queen Vashti must have had a good reason for not showing up when the king sent for her.   I mean… we have no way of knowing if she was busy at that moment.  She gave a separate banquet for the women, so she could have been right in the middle of her party; so did the king really expect her to just drop everything to come out and cater to his wishes?  Was he that prideful or competitive to demand that she make an appearance just to make him look good?  Lol!  Oh! I don't have enough room on this page to list how many complaints that I’ve heard from women about this very thing!  Does God expect us to just drop everything for our husbands?    Remember: considering someone else’s need above your own is the very idea that Jesus portrayed for Christianity.  Many women sing, “Make me more like you; oh make me more like you!”  Well, your marriage certainly has the potential to do just that… make you more like Jesus! 

It’s not about esteeming ourselves as less than the man.  It’s all about holding the word of God in the highest esteem; knowing that when you honor God’s word, He will honor you.  In God’s word, we find His order or line-up; and ahead of you, in line, is your husband.  It seemed to all of the kings men that Queen Vashti's decision not to show up at her husband’s request was an unspoken message to everyone that he wasn’t important; at least not as important as what she was already doing.  The men viewed her behavior as irreverent and an insult to all husbands in general. 

We can learn a lot by studying these men’s perception.  It’s good for all of us women to understand that men tend to view and evaluate things differently.   How many times have you cooked something special for someone else but not anything special for your husband?  How good do you look when you leave for work or other places and how good do you want to look for your husband?  Oh, I know... he’s your best friend and he doesn’t care how you look…  Well, since you don't have any "wise men" at your service, I guess I'll have to be the one to tell you that even though he sincerely and honestly says that to you- Please… don’t be stupid!

You could be placing your highest honor onto someone who isn’t even a part of God’s line-up and then all together ignoring the most important people in your life.   How sad to be a woman who yields "her best" to everyone else and then totally misses it with her own husband...  Who we choose to treat  "significant" really matters to God.  And any woman who chooses to treat her husband dishonorably or insignificant need not bother thinking that God’s promises will come to pass in her life.  Give your best to your husband and God will give His best to you.  It’s just like everything else in the word… it’s up to you to believe it and apply it.  Living it will most likely cost you some pride.  I have lived long enough to learn that pride will eventually cost you much more though.  The price that Vashti paid was her position and crown.   I do wonder if she thought about it later and then regretted her decision.  After a divorce… many women do and will.

I know you want to read about equality and your own significance… it’s in here too...  Check back next week and read further as I continue the teaching “Upon My Honor.”

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

Upon My Honor - Introduction

INTRODUCTION:  Probably many of us have seen the movie, “One Night with the King.”  I enjoyed the romantic spin that the writers tried to create but my interpretation from the book of Esther is somewhat different.  The thought of being brought to the king so that he can spend the night figuring out whether he likes you enough to make you queen, isn’t my idea of anything romantic.   Now don’t get mad at me for stating the facts… and don’t get mad at God either for allowing and even using such a thing.  He always meets humanity where humanity is; and for that we all should be grateful.   God shows up and works with people where they are and it’s never His fault when we end up in a less than ideal situation.   Earthly kings and earthly kingdoms were never God’s idea.  He warned man about the behavior of kings from the very beginning. 

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the story of Esther, let’s recap its beginning.   She was a Jewish girl who lost her parents at a young age; therefore, she was brought up by a relative named Mordecai.  It was a time of displacement for a lot of God’s chosen people because of their sin and disobedience.   The setting is around the Persian Empire where many of the Jews had ended up.  The story begins with the king (Ahasuerus) who orders a great feast with many dignitaries invited to show off some of the great splendor of his kingdom.  After feasting and drinking for a few days, the king sends for his queen (Vashti) so that he can show off her beauty to all of his male guests…   The only problem is… she’s busy giving a feast for the ladies and refuses to come at his request.  He was furious at her refusal and then later determined to take vengeance.  The king’s advisors suggested that he quickly remove her crown to teach her a lesson (not only her but to all women alike).

Their advice… Let young beautiful women be found and brought into the kingdom and then choose one to be your new queen.   So the king’s workers began selecting eligible women to be brought in and of course, Esther was found and added as a part of their collection.  This story is not about a king falling in love with a fair maiden.   Nor is it about a young maiden falling for a handsome prince.   Really, the sweetest emotion that is felt is the wonderful attachment that God feels toward His people and how He refuses to give up on us, no matter where we’ve ended up.   God can save a family or an entire nation just by saving one person who chooses to obey Him; and in this story of Esther becoming queen, that’s exactly what He did.  

Funny… most people think of Esther’s beauty as being her greatest asset but I always point out that all of the women who were brought into the kingdom were beautiful (I don’t care who you are; please don’t ever think that "pretty" is enough, lol).  Because of the hand of God being upon her, Esther was able to offer something more significant than beauty to the king and his kingdom.  A woman’s attractiveness might get her noticed for a few seconds but it will always be the women who know AND show honor that will win and keep positions.  Log in next week and find out just what I mean.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina

What is JOURNEY Doing Now?

Thank you to everyone who attended the “Then I Became in His eyes as one who found Peace” conference in Beulaville last week.  The atmosphere and the group of women were awesome!  God never disappoints when people show up with that kind of expectation!  We were blessed to say the least.  It’s not too late for you to schedule this event in your church.  Women are definitely worth the investment.  

I tell the church, “Women carry a huge influence.”  If you can help bring change to a woman then you have helped bring change to an entire family!  She can build her house or tear it down with her hands.  Through Journey, God is healing and strengthening women so that they can build… you can read a good book but it is still the anointing that breaks the yoke of bondage in our lives.  Many out of town conferences will be scheduled this year (usually great speakers, great shopping, great restaurants and great fun) but sadly the women who will need to be encouraged the most will not be able to attend because of their lack of finances.  Journey can help you bring the conference to them in your local church.

I’m very excited to invite those of you who are local to come join us for the next phase of the Journey out of Egypt ministry - “Journey Marriage.”  If you have looked at our website then you probably know that our vision begins with healing and strengthening women but our ultimate goal is to reunite the family back with God.  Journey Marriage is a local outreach for helping to heal and strengthen marriages through preaching, teaching, fun and fellowship.  We will begin meeting once a month here in one of our local churches.  If you would like more information about how to be a part of this once-a-month marriage celebration, you can contact us through our website- www.journeyoutofegypt.org.

In a few days, I will begin a new blog series, “Upon My Honor.”  Upon My Honor is one of my teachings from the book of Esther.    It has been my experience that women have heard more than enough about submission but haven’t heard nearly enough about honor.   God will never withhold anything good that He has promised us in His word but it will all depend on how and who we choose to honor.  As women, we tend to sometimes put a romantic spin on some of the Old Testament stories.  Esther is not a romantic novel but more of a story about obedience, faith and honor.  Most of us want something or need something from God.  And many women want to be given more opportunities and better positions where they can really make a difference.   Well, God is not stingy and He is handing down blessings one after the other… and girl, all you have to do is get in line… Upon My Honor will teach you how.

Loving U Like a Sister,

Regina